Speaker

Author

Coach

Bryan Turkel

I got the good grades, I excelled at all of the "right" things, so...

Where is my happy?

I know how you feel 

I was obsessed with getting things "right" and being seen as someone who was successful.

 

Whatever the situation, I needed to get an "A" in it. And to the outside observer I did it pretty well. I was a decorated athlete, graduated from a top college, and went right into a high-potential job. 

I tried to "apply" for the life I wanted

I focused on climbing the "accomplishment staircase," believing that if if I excelled in all of the right areas I would one day reach happiness at the top.

 

After college I thought I had finally built up enough accomplishments to qualify for "happy." However, at the top of the staircase I found...

Nothing... 

I thought the empty feeling was my fault

At first I felt cheated. Like, "we had a deal, world! I work hard, succeed where I should, and you give me happy." 

Then I started to feel depressed. I began to think there must be something wrong with meLike I had all of the pieces of this great life, but I was missing the necessary X-factor to put them together.

I lived like this for a while until I had an epiphany...

My life was "good on paper"

I was doing all of the "right" things and had all of the appearances of a happy, successful person with none of the satisfaction to go along with it.

If I was running an inspection on my life everything was up to code, but it definitely wasn't working.

The realization was like a thunderbolt

Yes, I was getting an A in life. But I was grading myself on someone else's rubric. I had spent my whole life trying to achieve someone else's success. That's why it never fulfilled me when I got it. 

I quit my job and started pursuing my own life.

Now, I coach Type-A, high achievers to have more satisfaction by helping live lives according to their own values and visions of success.